Discovering three pillars of coaching: my Journey through the Ashridge Master’s program

After 25+ years of dedicated coaching, my perspective transformed by three pillars that reshaped my coaching philosophy. This transformative discovery came through the Ashridge Master’s in Executive Coaching (AMEC) program. In 2014, I made the pivotal decision to elevate my coaching practice by pursuing the Ashridge program in the UK. My aim was to grow professionally, expecting to deepen my knowledge of theories, methods, instruments, and tools, while enhancing my confidence as an executive coach.

Self-examination: a key component of coaching development

While the program did include intellectual content, the real focus was self-examination—dissecting my own coaching practice through a combination of individual exercises and group assignments. Rather than boosting my confidence, AMEC led me into profound doubt about the coaching methods I had relied on for years. It was this journey of continuous questioning that triggered my eventual breakthrough.

Cartesian meditation: challenging coaching assumptions

I experienced what could be described as a “Cartesian meditation”—challenging my own long-held beliefs, truths, and assumptions in pursuit of undeniable coaching principles. I found clarity in the existentialist concept of Personal Experience—recognizing that as conscious beings, our individual experiences shape how we connect to the world around us. In coaching, this means separating the coach’s experience from the client’s, ensuring that we base our approach entirely on the client’s reality.

Doubt became a vital tool for creating a clear space between myself and the client. Through this separation, I learned that much of my previous coaching practice—like those of many coaches—was more about satisfying my own need for control and validation than truly serving my client.

Embracing doubt and listening

With this realization, I began to ask: if doubt is key to effective coaching, how do we move beyond the insecurities that arise from not knowing? The answer is simple but profound: Listen. As a coach, you must be fully present in the moment, allowing yourself to become a vessel that is mindful, empty, and receptive. Listening without filters or preconceptions lets your client’s world, emotions, and experiences emerge authentically. I realized that I had been a poor listener, with my mind too preoccupied with theories, diagnoses, and solutions—all aimed at maintaining control and bolstering my self-esteem.

Love in coaching as the third pillar

In this journey, I discovered that Doubt and Listening formed the foundational “body” of coaching. But it is Love that gives this body life. In coaching, love manifests as unconditional acceptance of the client and unwavering trust in their inherent power to navigate their own path, meet their needs, and grow.

Love is not something that simply happens to a coach; it is a conscious choice. Since integrating Doubt, Listen, and Love as core pillars, I have evolved into a more mindful listener, a thoughtful doubter, and a compassionate, loving coach. This trinity now forms the cornerstone of my coaching philosophy.

The transformative impact of the Ashridge Master’s program

Looking back, the AMEC program was the perfect choice for me. Thanks to the guidance of Simon, Charlotte, Ann, Erik, David, Tammy, and my unique cohort of fellow students, I have found my purpose and direction for the years to come. In May 2024, I proudly earned my Master’s in Executive Coaching from Ashridge.

For any (executive) coach seeking a personal, intellectually stimulating, and deeply rewarding journey, I wholeheartedly recommend the AMEC program.